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Welcome Back Awkward & Awesome

June 2, 2011

By:

Erin Schrader

Well hey there pretty pelicans…
{I think I just realized I am the only blogger who feels the need to welcome their readers and then sign off with a little farewell every.single.post.}
Something just doesn’t feel right when I don’t get in my little hello’s and good-byes..
And plus, that is when I get the majority of my name calling in.
If I stopped you would have none of that and what fun is that?
None.
So sorry folks, that habit is one that I am not going to kick anytime soon.
Anyhow, after a weeks hiatus from Awkward & Awesome, I am back
Armed and equipped with gobs of material.
I’ll save you some time and just post little bits of the gobs.
Awkward
1. So a few days back I was shopping-trying to purchase some homemade pizza crust, and the cashier was NOWHERE in sight. Of course I wasn’t going to give up and leave, so I waited it out. Low and behold the gentleman comes running up and says
“Sorry about that…I’m allergic to dairy and I just ate an ice cream sundae.
Woooey, that stuff went straight though me. It’s not good I tell ya, it is just coming right out of me…”
And in case I didn’t get the memo, he continued on with that banter until I walked away. Yumm, I can’t wait to sink my teeth into this allergic infested pizza crust.
Let’s hope it doesn’t give me the same reaction your sundae did.
2. The other day I was minding my own business inspecting a cheese platter sitting in the break room at work and I noticed a little piece of cheese that looked tempting. Naturally, I picked up the piece and smelled it to ensure I wanted to stick it in my mouth and within seconds of inhaling I realized it was Swiss.
So I do what every normal sanitary person would do…
stuck it back on the platter.
Only to turn around and see another co-worker witnessing the whole ordeal
{with her eyebrows raised}.
I smiled and walked out, no words were going to bring recovery to the situation.
3. Leaving a voicemail for somebody {correctly} and then calling that same person back within minutes and leaving a 2nd voicemail that was intended for somebody else.
Oh how I wish I could’ve witnessed that gentleman’s reaction when getting hit with that double whammy. Woopsie.
4. Waving to a baby at church in the most ridiculous way possible and then realizing I am getting waved back to by a teenage boy. I took the mature way out of the situation by elbowing my husband immediately and spewing out through my laughter and tears
“Did you see that boy thinking I was waving to him?!??!?!”…while the boy was still watching.
Sorry kid, maybe someday I will grow up and act like a normal adult and kindly wave back.
Maybe not though.
Awesome
1. Remember when I dished out a little bit of trash talk when encouraging you to enter the giveaway on my cousins blog for this necklace?
 
Look who’s trash talk paid off:
 And that is how you get it done girls.
2. Not just dressing like a basketball:
 
But also realizing that I am Harlem Globetrotters next up and coming star.
Hot dog.
I’m going to be real busy soon between the Hula Hoop World Championships and this.
3. The giveaway that is being held AS WE SPEAK. Click here to enter. You have the chance to look like a million bucks walking around with a fluffy little headband hanging out in your hair and button ring around your finger {if you win that is}.
Which I am sure you will…so enter πŸ˜‰
4. This billboard:
Ha, Love it.
Sorry sir, the world is still here..better luck next time.
5. Having my first ever “blogger” interview this week. I suddenly feel legit.
If only job interviews were that much fun.
 If you haven’t checked it out you may want to do so by clicking here.
You will probably learn a thing or two about me.
Also, you can thank me for marking this as my last “awesome” so you can exit just to find me somewhere else.
Sneaky Sneaky…See you soon πŸ˜‰
K lovers, that’s all I’ve got for now.
See you tomorrow. As in Friday. As in holy cow it’s Friday already. Wowzers.
Lets take Prince’s approach and party like its 1999.

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