It’s been a minute since I’ve written just to write. We’re talking sometime around when the world started to change drastically [March, I’m looking at you]. But, here I am, sipping a honey lavender latte in a hipster coffee shop pretending that I’m as cool as the people sitting next to me with something equally profound to say [do you ever just listen to people talk in coffee shops?! It’s all so deep and 99% above my head. Whatever happened to discussing celebrity crushes and whether or not we prefer our cheese in string or block format?] Anyhow, here I am, eager to simply let my fingers do the talking. I was watching Enneagram and Coffee’s IG stories yesterday [big enneagram girl here] and she posted yesterday how every morning she has non-negotiable writing time. The last time I implemented a non-negotiable task into my life it involved eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner. You can’t count on me for many things in life but you can sure as heck count on me for eating my next meal.

So what’s new? Well, let’s start with the basics. I’m still married to Shawn. Fun fact: I often worry that people will think we aren’t married because he prefers to never have his face shown on social media. He fails to understand that never being present causes people to jump to assumptions but you know what they say about assumptions. We still have Max and Ollie as our two children with still no big discussions centered around our plans for kids. This may blow some of your minds “wait? you just literally don’t talk about it!?” but allow yourself to be blown because that’s a fact, Jack. Maybe it will happen, maybe it won’t – the jury is still out on that one. The good news is our siblings make cute kids alongside our friends creating the same and well, there’s a lot of children in our lives. Children who need birthday gifts that I just remembered about. Thank you blog for reminding me to not be a negligent aunt and friend, I always knew you existed to bless my life in many ways 😉

In equally important news, I cried last night watching Kaitlyn Bristowe dance during Dancing with the Stars. THE WOMAN MOVED ME. I just really like her and also am really envious that there is no part of my body that understands how to move rhythmically so I’ll continue to live vicariously and cry through her dances. Somewhere along the lines of keeping our bones limber, I got my first wet suit yesterday [words I never thought I’d be typing]. Technically speaking, I didn’t get my first wet suit — my husband bought it for me because he is bound and determined to get my body in the ridiculously freezing water up until it snows to wake surf. I’m not sure if I should be flattered or very angry that he now expects me to do a polar bear plunge on the weekly.

I’m wearing cargo pants today, so that’s something else to mention. 2020 has brought a lot of statements alongside it that I’d never thought I’d be saying this year “let me grab my mask”, “that wasn’t a cough, I promise”, “I’m wearing cargo pants today” and so on. The bright side is that I feel like they are actually cute cargo pants and they pass the only test I run anything through these days — you know what test I’m talking about, the one that goes something like “yeah but are they comfortable enough to sleep in?” As long as the answer is yes, I could care less what the item[s] looks like. Speaking of not caring what things look like, I think I’m breaking up with eyeliner. Listen. I realized it was making me look like an old hag.  Now, I realize I haven’t ventured into the world of Botox [yet, I’m starting to get tempted] so naturally yes, I do look a little old haggish but this thick black line of eyeliner under my eyes was intensifying the situation so I think I’m done. At least today I’m done, we’ll see what tomorrow brings, my brain prefers to operate out of a place of whiplash.

Whoa. I just saw a jar of sugar for people to use in their coffee and I thought it was Parmesan cheese so I just picked it up to pour some out on my hand to try. I think this is my cue to be done.

Just wait, 2021 will have parmesan filled canisters in coffee shops, I can feel it.