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If I Was A Boy….

January 23, 2013


Erin Schrader

picture via second grade. 
my milkshake brought all the boys to the yard…
-I would take full advantage of trees, cornfields, and sides of the road whenever the time struck. 

-I would tell girls they are much prettier with make-up on (you know it’s true..)

-I would wrestle bears with my bare hands. That seems reasonable right?

-I would not pop collars, wear skinny jeans, or cut off tees.

-I would rock a Michael Jordan jersey daily.
or whatever jersey for that matter

-I would borrow a friends baby and take it grocery shopping (considering I was single and on the hunt..)

-I would eat like a maniac and then workout for a total of 5 days and be back to my ideal weight.

-I would shower my lady love with all things fried (chicken, green beans, fries, etc) and chocolate during that time of the month, every month. As soon as I delivered said goodies I would shack up in a local hotel for the remaining 5 days. Both parties would be happier.

-I would yell delights in the shower every morning such as “THANK YOU JESUS THAT I DON’T HAVE TO SHAVE MY LEGS OR MY ARMPITS!” and then probably spin in circles while splashing water all around.

-I would also yell delights like ‘THANK YOU JESUS THAT I DON’T HAVE ANY LEMONS THAT ARE EXPECTED TO SQUEEZE OUT CANTALOUPES” while I watch my significant other dry heave from the excruciating pain she is going though (birthing a child). 

-And last but not least, I would always secretly wish I was a woman.

What would you do? 
Link up with Gay and I and join in the fun.

(p to the s..I didn’t make any fancy button for this link up #bloggerfail but please just note in your post that you are linking up to us. please and thank you. you saw what I said I would do to that bear didn’t you?)


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