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My Former Life.

August 14, 2012


Erin Schrader

I’ve been delaying this post for a long time kids.
It’s something that I thought I would never actually talk about on this blog.
Mostly out of fear what you would all think about me and my “past”.
It is a dark scary place and something I don’t like to think back on…..
I am certainly not proud of what I did in my former years and I wish this upon nobody.
Thankfully I am now to a place though that I feel “okay” to talk about it.
The memories are tough but seemingly bearable.
It’s time to be honest with you all…
I used to be a Mary Kay consultant.
There. I said it. My secret is out.
You may be saying to yourselves “what’s the big deal?!?”
I will tell you what the big deal is ladies.
I used to be that girl.
That girl that would wander around Target, Kohls, Wal-Mart, etc just waiting for my opportunity to pounce on a cute girl. {that just got awkward}
I would find these girls and by “happenstance” be looking at the same necklace they would be.
And that’s when it would happen. I would open my mouth and recite something to the effect of
“You are so cute. I just love your shirt!! Have you ever had a Mary Kay facial before?!”
And I would do this for hours upon hours. Which always resulted in a very frustrated and tired phone call to my husband saying “I only got 5 girls to sign up for facials today! My feet are SO tired of walking around Target. I accidentally spent $230 when I was in there. I don’t think this whole “warm chatter” thing is paying off…”
And every single time he would laugh in my face and think I was the most absurd female on planet Earth. And he was right girls. He was so freakin’ right.
I was a facial freak.
Day in, day out, I would give “facials” to strangers in my house.
Never making a dime.
But oh I thought I was so business savvy….
Panty hose and all.
Last week I had an opportunity to bring back my facial giving days.
And this time, I didn’t even have to walk around Kohls for three hours to make it happen.
Insert this little girl {who is now taller than I am…what?}
Oh what a difference seven years can make….
How cute is she? Seriously.
And you know what? It was pretty dang fun. 
It may have something to do with the fact that I wasn’t trying to squeeze every dollar out of her.
Or maybe because this time I actually knew a little bit about what I was doing. Maybe it’s because for once I realized I was helping an already beautiful girl feel a little bit more beautiful….Or heck, it’s probably just because I love her so much. Yeah, I think it’s that.
So Zoe, if you are reading–thank you 😉
All of this got me curious though—what did you do in your “former life”?
Share in the comments below…I’d love to hear it.
ps. If you are a Mary Kay consultant I do not think less of you. Unless you approach me in Target and sucker me into coming to your house for a “free” facial. In which case I will punch you in the face.
pss. I wouldn’t actually punch you in the face. But I would kick you in the shins. After buying three mascaras, ten containers of eye make up remover, and two lip glosses, thank you very much.


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