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Bracelets, Watermelon, and Booty Smackin..{Minus The Booty Smackin}

August 16, 2011

By:

Erin Schrader

Word.
Can we stop for a moment and appreciate the word “Word”.
So effortless, so flawless, and yet so very versatile.
You wanna say hey-say word.
You wanna agree with somebody-say word.
You wanna say something profound but nothing comes to mind-say word.
{In today’s case, I used it for reasons number 1 and 3}
K, well now that I got that English lesson out of the way, let’s make up for lost time shall we?
And by lost time I am referencing missing out on Miscellaney Monday yesterday.
I kinda love Miscellaney Mondays because it allows me to not have to think about something so highly inspirational to write about.
Everybody needs a break from being so motivating all the time ya heard?
{Sarcasm people, Sarcasm}
With all of that being said, lets get this Miscellaneous shaz started.
One other English lesson real quick-
Shaz=word you say when you don’t say curse words.
Okay, I am taking off the teacher hat now I promise…
 
One.
So I saw this awesome tutorial here on how to make these bracelets:
I swore I was going to bust out my crafty bones and make one.
But then, I stumbled into Kohls and saw this beauty for $2.40.
Needless to say-my crafty bones will not be coming out soon.
However-My lazy, love good deals bones came out and had a blast paying for this sucker.
They are having even more fun wearing it.
Sorry tutorial, but my time and money do not apologize.
 
Two.
We bought a watermelon yesterday.
As I carried it into the house from the car, the only thing I could think about was
“Holy crap. So this is what it feels like to have a baby come out of you…”
Except the watermelon wasn’t actually coming out of me-I was holding it remember.
Regardless, I started feeling pains in parts I’ve never felt pain before.
Thank you watermelon for extending my desire for child birth an additional 
two {hundred} years.
{If you couldn’t tell, my husband is a mean watermelon cutter. Kids got talent.}
 
Three.
Is this not the best invention ever?
Maybe if I had that under my feet, I would stop taking this approach:
Probably not though.
 
Four.
Is it pathetic I get envious of retired people on a regular basis?
Let me answer this.
No.
And by that I mean yes, it probably is.
 
Five.
Speaking of Retirees-sometimes my man and I like to play like we are 80 and attend car cruise-ins.
They are a fun in a boring kind of way.
Two things I learned about myself while perusing the aisles of old cars:
1. I take approximately 9 million pictures too many when attending these events.
It is a great way to trick all the old folk into believing I am some car fanatic and know a thing or two about their 1926 Chevelle.
Fortunately, I don’t know even know what a 1926 Chevelle is or if it even exists.
2. Getting to stand on a really big rock..rocks.
I pretty much felt like owned that car cruise in.
Looking back, yeah-I totally did.
 
Six.
So not to brag or anything about how amazing my husband is…
but he totally shampooed the inside of my car and did a full clean out of it the other day.
Okay you are right, I did intend to brag about how amazing my husband is.
My booty has never felt better sitting on those poo’d seats.
{It means shampooed seats}
It was just a lot more fun to say poo for all obvious reasons.
 
Seven.
On a more serious note-being an Indiana girl and all, I find it necessary to ask for you to please pray for the families and friends of those who were killed and/or injured at our State Fair this past weekend. Watching the video of the stage collapsing makes me sick to my stomach and I can not even begin to imagine how those involved are feeling after such an accident.
Life is so very precious friends.
Do Not Forget It.
 
….Sorry to end on a somber little note there.
To cheer you up click here.
You can win a Target gift card.
Except you won’t actually win, because chances are good I will.
HAHAHAHHA.
That is an evil laugh…except without the B.
I will never.ever.ever type BAHAHAHA.
Because guess what?
I can’t stand that.
Just sayin’.
Next time when you laugh and it comes out with a B in front of it let me know.
I would be interested in knowing if that actually happens.
 
…And on that note, I sound really bitter.
I’m not.
I promise.
Except if you BAHAHAHAH in my face.
Then I might be 🙂
 
HAPPY TUESDAY SWEET MUFFINS.
 
Duh, speaking of giveaways-I kinda forgot I have one going on right now too.
Double dog dare ya.
 

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